The Foundation of Manhood
A comprehensive explanation of a topic I've done absolutely no research into.
Your definition of manhood doesn't matter.
Everyone mad now? Good. I want you to have a combative perspective going into this because I prefer being right amongst adversaries.
Now that we've established that feeling, let's add a little credentialism just to raise the temperature further. Everybody loves reading about why so-n’-so is an expert.
I was born and raised in the hood and graduated from there to prison. I spent my entire childhood and the majority of my adult life within the most hyper masculine subculture in America. Not only that, but my time was spent almost exclusively in the company of the kind of men who rose to the top in these places.
The best “worst” men the world has to offer.
If you're vibrating with irritation because you're expecting me to use them as a template of what manhood really is, this isn't going to go the way you think it is. But that's okay, I set you up to fail.
While you were trying to figure out what makes a guy into a man, I was living in what makes a man dysfunctional. I realized then that manhood isn't learned but rather the natural state of being male so long as it isn't interfered with.
My decades of experience living with and being one of these men has taught me something about manhood. It showed me in what ways we're made to function defectively. I'm sure everyone has heard the term “toxic masculinity”. I'm going to use it here however you can toss out whatever feminazi versions you've been subjected to. They stumbled onto the correct term but then completely misunderstood what it actually means.
It's not their fault, they're just girls with cooties after all.
We can argue all day every day about what a man should be and we're all going to be wrong because all we're actually doing is listing off things we like. It's like debating if a house is good based on the decorations rather than the structure. It doesn't matter if you fill it with nice things if the foundation is crumbling.
I like that metaphor, let's keep using it.
How you decorate a bathroom means little if the plumbing is no good. The garden is a waste of your energy if the electrical wiring is frayed and dangerous. Do you understand what I mean in establishing an order of priorities here?
Stop focusing on the little things he should be, the decorations, because you're looking at it wrong.
Manhood is actually simple. Once we understand the structure of the house, we can identify what is broken or in need of attention. Then we can take care of those things. After that, it doesn't matter what he fills it with, his personality, because he'll be a good man doing it at that point.
That brings us to the blocks that make up the substructure of his house. The aspects of ourselves which must be in good working order so that our foundation can be solid.
Our Capacity for violence and the ability to successfully demonstrate it.
Our ability to experience financial success and be recognized by others for it.
Our possession of something of material value worth protecting.
Having sexual prowess and experiencing appreciation for it
Creating a biological lineage and seeing it live up to our expectations.
Having a valued role in a community/tribe/group
Our ability to create and provide, to build and sustain.
Our ability to compete with and defeat others.
In a perfect world, each one of those would be a fully formed and stable addition to a man's foundation. No cracks or seems of any kind. In the real world, that's not a thing. I've never met a man who enjoyed perfect solidity in every one of those points.
What does that mean since few guys are stable in all of their foundational blocks?
Stick close to me, we're heading into the basement now. Watch your head.
The less a man is able to rely on each of those blocks, the more he must compensate with the others. This is where real masculinity starts drifting into the toxic variety. Where one fails to support the foundation of who he is, the more those remaining must take on the burden to hold his house up.
A few examples would be a man who is unable to sire a biological lineage could likely compensate though adding additional pressure to the experiencing success block or overcompensate dysfunctionally by identifying himself according to the sexual prowess one. Feeling that must be where his value is found.
A man who experiences no value from being a part of a tribe or group may compensate by creating added value to things and ideals, rather than people, to protect and covet. Reimagining the purpose of the block and utilizing it in a way it wasn't designed for.
The point is that the weight of the house, who a man is, doesn't decrease. It is what it is. The fragility or outright absence of each block causes him to compensate with additional expectations of the remaining ones.
Let's use the sociological experiment I've called my life as an example.
Imagine a violent criminal. Make him as savage and cold as possible in your mind. Imagine, if you will, the life he leads. Now look at the blocks and picture which ones are missing and which ones are exaggerated to extremes to compensate for that.
Does this man experience financial success? Does he have something of value worth defending? Is he able to create and provide? Probably not. Not coincidentally though, he's extremely able to demonstrate violence and sexual prowess and even creating a lineage again and again and again. The available blocks carry all of the weight. The fewer one has, the more unsound the remaining ones become trying to overcompensate and split the pressure of the house above.
In prison, we had almost all of those taken away. Which is why you'd never find a more violent, competitive and tribal man than you would within those walls. They're the only blocks we had left and our entire identities were built on top of them.
In the suburbs, many guys are conversely missing just as many of the opposing blocks. That's why there's so many workaholics with “grown-up toys”.
Allow me simplify this even further. Imagine the guy with a tiny dick. What kind of car is he driving?
The point is that the interpretations we argue as being what defines a man are arbitrary at best. What he should do, how he should act, yadda yadda yadda. If the foundational blocks aren't solid, none of that matters, it's all subject to crumble anyway.
We're focusing too much on the decorations and furniture while ignoring the substructure and overall soundness of the house. A fresh coat of paint and curtains don't do a whole Hell of a lot in a condemned trap house.
You need to look to those blocks first before you worry about the rest. It doesn't matter what defining characteristics a man has if his foundation is addressed. He'll be a good man by virtue of that alone. You may not think it's a good looking house in your personal opinion, but that won't change that it's a solid one.
Thanks for stopping by.
Now get out of my house.
Another fantastic piece J. You clearly are a deep thinker, I’m sure the questioning side of your mind never stops whirring, like myself.
How I have come to see the world for men is this:
Organized crime gangs run the world. They have deliberately destroyed mans connection with himself to stay in power. Young men are sent to war to cull the young bull population so they won’t rise up and topple the organized crime cartel. The elite are terrified of this. Sports are saturating most legacy media channels globally to fulfil the need for tribe. My team is better than yours!, while the elite invent new carbon taxes and poison your food, drinking water, hypnotise you into taking potentially lethal experimental mRNA jabs.
Most men I grew up with are depressed on some level. Most don’t live on their edge. I figured out how the legal and financial system works, I figured out the game and I stopped paying the mortgage on my home over 10 years ago as I figured out the fraud. The vulture fund tried all sorts of tricks to repossess my home in court but couldn’t get past my basic questions about who I actually owe alleged money to and eventually abandoned their action. I still have my home.
Everything is a fraud on man.
Money is an illusion and of no value.
The legal system claims you are a legal person which is a corporation in their eyes and of the lowest status in law.
Government ministers are actually employees of a corporation who pretend to represent the people.
Local government are programmed to extort you of rates, property taxes, planning rights on your own dwelling. All actions are unlawful.
99% of the population of the west does not know the difference between what is legal and what is lawful(lawful being superior).
Boys are supposed to go through a right of passage at age 14 with older men to make them men. Tribal communities still do this as they understand the importance of it as they will remain boys indefinitely if not done.
Police are in place mostly to protect rules of society (statutes) written by corporations to keep men suppressed, ignorant and poor.
Your government hates you and is trying to kill you in every way imaginable as modern government is only a screen for totalitarian oligarchy where they have to hide their true intentions as they do not want to be beheaded again as per the French Revolution.
The good news is the people are currently rising all over the world and we will finally be given the opportunity to create the world the way it should be, in harmony in nature, with communities built in nature, healing in nature and respecting nature and its cycles.
Life is simple, psychopaths have made it a struggle to survive, provide, be proud of your achievements and be happy, while they hoard all the material wealth and stay miserable.
Couldn’t agree more. Structure will always trump decor when push comes to shove. Maybe when I have a moment I will be brave enough to put together the Foundation of Womanhood. Now that would get a lot of haters.